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Everybody Chafes....... (performed in the style of R.E.MS " everybody hurts)

Swamp ass, Mud Butt, Chub Rub, Bat wings......Just to name a few. Don't let these embarrassing ailments get the best of your day. If you're like most people you have experienced the oh so uncomfortable sensation of chafing and its one that you only want to feel once. So how do you remedy this embarrassing dilemma? Three words " Pilgrim's Machine oil." Your intimate areas will thank you. Pilgrim's Machine oil uses soothing organic plant oil's as its base which makes it unique. Unlike powders which clump and turn into a pancake like batter, our oil goes on smooth, creating a silken like barrier of protection allowing your sensitive areas to relax and heal. 

A little history on the creation of Machine oil.

It all began with with my boyfriend who spent tireless months trying to convince me to create an anti-chaffing oil. While working in the film industry a bunch of guys were talking about using sweet almond massage oil to combat chaffing. At first he was skeptical and then went home to try the massage oil, the next day they were all wearing massage oil on their nether regions and couldn't stop talking about how nice it felt. We took this idea a few steps further to incorporate a soothing blend of Organic Castor and Kukui nut oils and combined them with the soothing and anti microbial oils of Lavender, cedar wood and Tea tree for our own proprietary blend of anti chaffing oil. If you're still not convinced, check out our reviews

but....wont rubbing oil on my nether regions make me feel oily all day?

Not exactly. The idea is to have your area well lubricated so that when your skin rubs together your protected. Our oil will "dry" as the day goes by and your nether region soothed.

I'm interested but how exactly do I use this product?

To use, make sure you only apply to clean and dry skin. Use like a lotion, a dime size amount to start will do. Rub your palms together to warm the oil then apply to any area prone to chafing. You know you're body the best so if you need more, feel free to apply liberally."Pilgrim's" Machine oil will wash off easily with soap and water. If any irritation occurs, please discontinue use immediately. "Pilgrim's" Machine oil is not intended to treat or cure any diseases or Ailments, but merely helps soothe discomfort. If you are sensitive to essential oils, please do a patch test first. Use a small amount of " Pilgrim's" Machine oil on your arm and wait a couple minutes. 

Still have questions? Feel free to reach out anytime


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★ Reviews

Let customers speak for us

282 reviews
use it every time

I have ordered two tins of this balm now and I have to say, I love it. Not only is it not as thick and sticky as other balms I've tried, but it really does help the healing process and sooth any itching if you use it appropriately (it is also nice to freshen up already healed tattoos as well). I will likely use this product for every tattoo I get, provided the product sticks around!

Like honey for ink

This balm has been fantastic on my latest piece, and overdelivers on what’s promised by BG. The itching phase was almost completely negated by this balm, and has kept the skin thoroughly nourished to allow effective healing. Would give 6 stars if their system allowed it!

Pilgrim's Deodorant is great!

Love the product it smells great is not over bearing. It is a natural deodorant so if you are planning on using. Warm it up a little before applying.


Ordered both the unscented and wild orange and cedar clay pomades. It’s so hard to find quality pomade that is unscented this one checks ask the boxes, clean ingredients, nice hold, dry Matte with no grease. And no distracting unwanted fragrance. (That being said the scented version does smell great!)

Great product

It’s a natural product that healed my tattoo great